Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Trivia Time

Many years ago, in Scotland, a new game was invented. It was ruled "Gentlemen Only, Ladies Forbidden"....and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.

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The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.

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Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.

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Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.

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Coca-Cola was originally green.

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It is impossible to lick your elbow.

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The State with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska

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The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28% ( now get this...) The percentage of North America that is
wilderness: 38%

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The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $6,400

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The average number of people airborne over the US any given hour: 61,000

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Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

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The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.

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The youngest Pope was 11 years old.

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The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.

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The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments.

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Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:

Spades - King David

Hearts - Charlemagne

Clubs - Alexander, the Great

Diamonds - Julius Caesar

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111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321

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If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle.
If the horse has one front leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle.
If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.

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Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th, John Hancock and Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on August 2, but the last signature wasn't added until 5 years later.

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Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?

A. Their birthplace

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Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name requested?

A. Obsession

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Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter "A"?

A. One thousand

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Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?

A. All were invented by women.

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Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil? A. Honey

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Q. Which day are there more collect calls than any other day of the year?

A. Father's Day

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In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase "goodnight, sleep tight."

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It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's
father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their
calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month...which we know today as the honeymoon.

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In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts. So in old England, when customers got unruly, the
bartender would yell at them "Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down. It's where we get the phrase
"mind your P's and Q's"

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Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim, or handle, of their
ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by this practice.

~~~~~~~~~~~AND FINALLY~~~~~~~~~~~~

At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Weiler's Law

Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself.

Truths of Management

  • Think before you act; it's not your money.
  • All good management is the expression of one great idea.
  • No executive devotes effort to proving himself wrong.
  • Cash in must exceed cash out.
  • Management capability is always less than the organization actually needs. Truth 5.1 of Management: Organizations always have too many managers.
  • Either an executive can do his job or he can't.
  • If sophisticated calculations are needed to justify an action, don't do it.
  • If you are doing something wrong, you will do it badly.
  • If you are attempting the impossible, you will fail.
  • The easiest way of making money is to stop losing it.

Troutman the Wise Man

Troutman's Laws of Computer Programming
  • Any running program is obsolete.
  • Any planned program costs more and takes longer.
  • Any useful program will have to be changed.
  • Any useless program will have to be documented.
  • Any program will expand to fill available memory and beyond.
  • The size of a program expands to fill all available memory.
  • The value of a program is inversely proportional to the weight of its output.
  • The complexity of a program grows until it exceeds the capability of its maintainers.
  • Any system that relies on computer reliability is unreliable.
  • Any system that relies on human reliability is unreliable.
  • Make it possible for programmers to write programs in English, and you will find that programmers cannot write in English.
  • Profanity is the one language all programmers know best.

Troutman's Programming Postulates

  • If a test installation functions perfectly, all subsequent systems will malfunction.
  • Not until a program has been in production for at least six months will the most harmful error be discovered.
  • Job control cards that positively cannot be arranged in proper order will be. Interchangeable tapes won't.
  • If the input editor has been designed to reject all bad input, an ingenious idiot will discover a method to get bad data past it.